Clown fish - hierarchy help !

Hi guys, can any one help advise me please? I have 2 x b&w clowns that have been introduced into my aquarium 3 weeks ago and all has been fine until 2 days ago when they the female started bullying the male, scary and heartbreaking to watch! I was advised that this was normal 'pairing ritual' and as long as there was no injuries to the male clown things would be fine and to leave them to it. Today i've noticed the male has hid away most of the day in the anemone and not ventured out at all and when he did i see he has lost he colouring (gone very pale) My question is, has he had enough of a beating from the female? or is this the anemone constantly stinging him that's causing the colour loss? The other 3 clowns i have host in the anemone fine and are not showing any signs of stinging or stress. How long should i leave them pairing like this ? any advise, greatly received...i am a relatively new and novice marine reef hobbyist !!!...:D